dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
