This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
