The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Ladies don't puke and tell
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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