ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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