woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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