Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
