i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I would fuck him just for his dog
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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