He asked me if I "almost moaned"
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
