using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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