Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
