We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
