she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
