he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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