hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I would fuck him just for his dog
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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