This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize