Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
