After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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