What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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