she was so not down for the gang bang
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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