Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
