Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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