You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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