I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
