So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
