His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
