so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
