I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
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