Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
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