fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Randomize
