If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
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