physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
