he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
It was confusing and full of hummus
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
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