Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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