this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Randomize
