i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
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