I am puke
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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