if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
