I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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