You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
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