remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
