I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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