In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
