I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
