maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Randomize
