Swine flu. Run for my life!
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
