Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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