I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
