Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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