do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize
