READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
