told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
