i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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